Holiday Form Letter!

Greetings and salutations!

The Peterson family had yet another wonderful year! Rico spent another year complaining, sprawled out on the couch. When he’s not on the couch leaving a trail of hair, he’s fighting. This summer he lost a tooth and has another notch out of his ear after a tussle with the neighbor’s calico!

He’s such a cad!

Alice has just been a charmer. Sophia and her boyfriend bought a $5,000 labradooodle named Murphy, a wonderfully dumb beast with jowls that are always soaked with slobber. When you pet him, your hand gets drenched with dog spit. But it’s a small price to pay for such unconditional affection!

Alice took to him immediately, attacking him the second he came into the door with her sharp, sharp, claws. There was some initial concern that he would lose that eye, but after a rather extensive examination and a quick trip to the vet, we were all relieved to learn that he will only have a permanent scar! It’s truly a blessing how things work out!

Alice, meanwhile, only peed on the clean laundry an even dozen times this year! Imagine the surprise when we grab one of those towels after a shower. But she’s so soft! We couldn’t bear to take her to the shelter!

Gus had a delightful year. He spends his days in front of the food bowl. He’s as plump and jolly as ever, when he’s not clawing the recliner, which now looks like something we grabbed from the side of the street. He’s an indoor beast, though he got out once this summer and came home covered in pine pitch. We didn’t even ask, we just gave him a bath and a big hug. He promptly went in the other room, knocked over Jimmy’s cage and, well, let’s just say we don’t have a bright green parakeet anymore!

And Nix! We, er, the wife, found her at the park across the street a couple years ago. Someone had inadvertently put the kitten in a garbage can of all places! Well she’s been nursed back to health and has been making friends with the local mouse population. She leaves their heads on the porch.

It’s darling I tell you!

Ginger the dog is getting up there in years, but is just as lovable as ever.

Her bladder is shrinking and she only gets up four or five times a night to be let out, that is, of course, when she doesn’t relieve herself on the floor. Thank the Lord we have wood floors!

She sheds about half her coat a day, but her adorable smile every morning makes it all worthwhile, just don’t get too close to her face, her breath would curl paint!

Well, that’s all for now. Have a wonderful 2018.

Chris Peterson is the editor of the Hungry Horse News.