Sunday, November 24, 2024
28.0°F

River idiots

by Jerry Smalley
| June 30, 2015 1:24 PM

In my book, people who float the Flathead River without life jackets, in their possession, are idiots.

One evening last week my daughter wanted to cool her feet in the river, so she hopped into my personal pontoon boat, while her husband, brother and I accompanied her in a raft.

We floated from Teakettle Fishing Access in Columbia Falls to Pressentine FAS east of the airport.

As we floated past the Montana Veterans' Home, we were passed by a loud group of about eight people in several inexpensive vinyl 'donuts.'

They immediately got our attention by their loud, rude, obnoxious comments, several directed towards us.

By the time we were about half mile upstream from Pressentine, my daughter and I had traded places. I was fishing river-right, as the raft worked the river-left shoreline.

I heard someone yell, "Do you have a location? We need help!"

I kicked towards shore where I found "the group," huddled around a girl sitting on the ground.

"Where's Pressentine?" I was asked. "Someone's having a 'diabetic situation' and we need to get her to Pressentine."

I showed them the trail and told them, hike or float, they'd better get moving.

Then someone told me they'd already called for an ambulance.

I motioned for the raft to join us. One girl and the 'diabetic' girl (whom I was told "they really didn't know")got into the raft and my son rowed them to Pressentine, where the ambulance was waiting.

I noticed the group had no life jackets.

I coached them around the lethal submerged snags just upstream from the takeout. Their floatees would be no match for those logs. Then I heard someone say, "We're going to Old Steel Bridge."

If they'd continued floating I would have asked the ambulance to contact Search and Rescue because they obviously didn't know what they were doing, especially with no life jackets.

Waiting in the Pressentine parking lot were the Evergreen Ambulance, three Evergreen Search and Rescue vehicles and 3 Flathead County Sheriff's Department vehicles. We were told the helicopter had been called back after our raft was spotted. Obviously there was more going down than just a 'diabetic situation.' And that may have explained the sudden plan to stay on the river and the fact the younger members stayed away from the parking lot.

Too bad FWP wasn't present to issue citations for having no life jackets.

Side note: River guides have told me there are lots of idiots floating the Flathead North Fork, some of whom make snide comments about the commercial river trips.

Then later, after they've drifted into a logjam or dumped their boat or floatee at the Wave, the idiots expect those same professional guides to save their butts.

Go figure!

Always have life jackets when you're on the river.