Recounting the Snoose Myth

Imagine the nerve of some people? In 1995, while I was still in shock trauma from learning Ostroms were part Swede not Norwegian… some non-sympathetic guy from Swan Lake wrote me this note:

"Dear George,

I… am… writing… this slowly… as I know… you Swedes… don't read… very fast.

I know you like to make fun of us Norwegians but remember, we send all of our crazy Norwegians to Sweden… to teach school."

Of course! I was just asking for this kind of thing when I publicly revealed our family secret; and, the ribbing has never stopped. Found another letter in old files this week. This 1999 item from a man in Ronan:

"George,

"Some fodder for you — The Swedish Guide to Computer Lingo: "LOG ON: Making da wood stove hotter. LOG OFF: Don't add no more wood. MEGAHERTZ: When the big log drops on your bare foot in da morning. MODEM: What ya did to da hay fields last summer. MOUSE: Vhat leaves dem little turds in da cupboard." Etc.

Many wiseacres have sent me the words to the song, "Ten T'ousand Svedes." Will repeat just a few stanzas here:

"Vay, Vay back in history, back ven da world was new, Norwegians searched all over, to find some snoose to chew.

My Grandpa says, and he should know, da Svedes made up their minds, to beat da Norsky Vikings, and kick a few behinds.

But history, so my Grandpa says, shows dat da Norskies von. Dey clobbered all da Svedes and Danes — and made it lots of fun.

Ten t'ousand Svedes ran tru da veeds, chased by vun Norvegian. Da dust from da veeds made snoose for da Svedes.

And dey called it Copenhagen!"

Any good kindly Norwegian would have to admit this song is at least a slight exaggeration of the actual historic facts, but where are we going to find a….?

Last week at the dedication of the friendship monument in Woodland Park, a Norwegian fella from North Dakota came up to me and said, "George. You're a state history buff, but I've never heard you mention the first Swede who settled in Montana."

Asked him for some details and he said, "Well! It happened around 1870. Ole Inar Olson moved here from North Dakota and it doubled the I.Q. of both states."

Have been pondering this for days and am not sure exactly what the guy meant; however, I'm pretty sure he just made that up.

Sincerely regret losing those days when people of different national origins could sit around and joke with each other. There were no exclusions, and the kidding was done in a friendly manner. Remember as a boy, sitting at a miner's picnic in Butte where there were people from England, Ireland, Sweden, Italy, you name it. The English were called "Cousin Jacks," Italians "Dagos," Irish were "Micks," Polish were "Pollocks." Those men respected each other for the dangerous work they shared. Their national nicknames were used in a good-humored manner.

Right now, in the current age of "paranoid political correctness" it appears the only types acceptable for public satire and kidding are white male Caucasians, and people running for President.

First Wife Iris and I just had a fun weekend of relaxation at the fabulously restored Davenport Hotel in Spokane. The glories of that beautiful structure, built in 1914, make it one of the finest hotels of this and the last centuries in Northwest United States history. Went there the first time when my father and mother took us on vacation to the coast in 1940.

Our vacation was unusual in that my father may have been one of the first laboring type people in this county to be given a "paid vacation." Can remember some of the kids at Flathead Mine School being envious. It was unheard of around here for a working man to be given a week's pay when he wasn't actually working. Thank goodness we've come a long way since then.

G. George Ostrom is a Kalispell resident and Hungry Horse News columnist.