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Elephant-size opportunity

| July 17, 2008 11:00 PM

There comes a time in your life when you have an experience or reach a milestone and you think to yourself, "Well, I saw that, so I can die happy now."

For journalists, it's usually some big award like winning a Pulitzer Prize or something else that gives you fame and a big fat check.

For me, that moment came last Thursday, when, by the grace of God and the last cash in my pocket, I got to ride on an elephant.

It wasn't a long trip. But it was a true blue elephant at the Culpepper and Merriweather Circus. Boy Wonder and I took one short lap on the African elephant named Congo and believe me, that was long enough.

Riding on an elephant for a short distance is fun, but riding on an elephant the way we rode on an elephant would at first, be unpleasant and then slowly, but surely become downright painful.

See, an elephant has a big, round broad back and when you sit right on the crest of the big round broad back you stretch in places you normally don't stretch unless you're on the Olympic gymnastics team.

Trust me: I'm no Paul Hamm. Just the sight of a balance beam or floor exercise gives me cramps in odd places.

But the kid wanted an elephant ride, so I obliged. All told, it cost $12. I mentioned to the trainer that the elephant was very well behaved and he mentioned back that she was very spoiled and I guess he may have been right — all she seemed to do all day was eat hay, drink water and carry the occasional gawker around on her back.

There could be worse ways to make a living.

I mentioned to the trainer that I wouldn't want to ride around on this elephant all day long and he said the only way you can is to get right up on their neck behind their ears and that made sense — it's a lot narrower up there and there'd be a whole lot less stretching going on.

A friend took some pictures of us on the elephant and just as the shutter clicked the wind blew up my shirt, so I look like I'm pregnant and smiling.

Or maybe that smile is a grimace from a groin tendon being stretched beyond its limits. Reaching milestones in one's life takes sacrifices. I'm willing to do my part.

Chris Peterson is the photographer for the Hungry Horse News.