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The problem with luck

| November 29, 2006 11:00 PM

What exactly is luck, anyway? Some people seem to have it in spades, while others seem utterly cursed. Take me, for example. I have the worst luck ever when it comes to anything that deals with patience.I always get stuck behind someone who thinks 45 mph is a good speed on the highway.

I always hit every red light.(Now do you see why I ride a bike everywhere?)I always get the slowest checker, and I always (seriously) get stuck behind the shopper trying to conjure up some advanced calculus formula to make exact change with $25 in pennies.

Since time is about the only thing I actually have, I can't stand other people wasting it. So of course, my worst luck wastes my best asset.

When it comes to not getting my way, I do what any person would - pout.I was in a real funk on Sunday after driving in to Kalispell twice. I don't even want to talk about it.But then I read about two other guys to whom I will concede the unlucky crown.

The first is a man named John Lyne who lives in Great Britain. In 54 years, he has suffered 16 major accidents, including two lightning strikes, a rock fall in a mine, nearly drowning and three car crashes.His latest accident happened recently when he fell down a manhole. He will be down for 32 weeks as his back, knees and left leg heal.As a child, he fell off a horse and cart only to be run over by a delivery van.When he was a teenager, he fell from a tree and broke his arm. He went to the hospital and saw the doctors. On the way home, the bus he was riding in crashed and he broke the same arm in a different place. At that point, I think I'd just lock myself in a closet and call it a life. Another man in Croatia, Frane Selak, also spent most of his life invisible to lady luck.Selak said he realized that demons were after him back in 1962 when the train he was on skipped the track and plunged into an icy river. Seventeen people drowned and he barely made it to the bank even though he had hypothermia.Two years later, he was thrown from a crashing plane. He landed in a haystack. Would you call him lucky for that at least?Three years after that, again in a bus, four people died when the vehicle crashed into the river. Selak again swam to safety.In 1970, his car caught fire as he drove down the motorway, but he escaped before the fuel tank exploded. The same thing happened to him in 1973.In the early 90s he was hit by a bus. A year after that he had to leap out of his car, which was hurtling downhill, after dodging a United Nations truck.But just days after turning 74, Selak's luck changed. He won Croatia's lottery to the tune of $1.2 million.Maybe there's hope after all. Maybe someday I'll win a new car or a huge shopping spree. Maybe I'll even hit the jackpot.So if I ever win the lottery, I'm hiring a chauffeur to do all my driving and another person to do all my shopping. Good luck.