Madams and Mercedes

Interesting trial coming up next month in Seattle involving international intrigue and hanky panky. It's not exactly James Bond caper, but it still might make a fun movie.

He hasn't been convicted of anything yet so I'll call our lead player "Desi." Desi is a U.S. Custom's Agent at the Canadian border in Washington state and he has allegedly used Yankee ingenuity to work out a simple little with a lady who lives up in Surre, British Columbia. Desi stands accused of allowing the Canadian lady to drive into the United States without being searched. As it turns out she has been sneakin' in some high class merry-juana.

It just so happens the "BC Bud" lady is also the madam of a cozy little cat house down the road from where Desi lives. In court proceedings, it came out that Desi made regular visits to the brothel in order to receive love in payment for helping the madam through customs. He was also given cash along with the free romance so the Feds want him charged with accepting bribes. Desi was released from custody by a Federal Judge who said he could return to his residence in Canada last week with a $20,000 bond. He headed back to Surrey.

The Federal Prosecutors in Seattle aren't happy with that arrangement even though Desi is supposed to be "monitored" until his trial.

One has to wonder if the U.S. Customs are going to let Desi keep working in the Border Station, and if he will keep wearing his uniform when he goes to the cat house. His attorney says people should let Desi alone. He has not been accused of anything violent. . . just getting a little love.

On an entirely different subject, I'm still wondering whether it would be prudent for someone like me, nearing eighty, to buy a new car. The basic question is if my 1991 with 184,000 miles on it will last as long as I do. Another question is whether a good used one would last long enough? That's the problem with dealing in unknown figures.

There was an article on cars in the Saturday papers. One of the feature vehicles was a newly engineered Mercedes. It runs on diesel, has all the famous driving luxuries and costs $51,500. The clincher, I felt, was that it gets 36 miles per gallon, so I started a conversation with Iris.

"What do you think about me getting this new economical Mercedes, the one that gets 36 miles per gallon, and only costs a little over fifty thousand dollars?"

"You have to be kidding. How in world would yo pay for it?"

"Well Iris! Here's the plan. I figure the saving from getting such good mileage will be over a thousand dollars a year, so it doesn't take much arithmetic to see the Mercedes would practically pay for itself in the next 25 years."

Iris looked into my eyes with love and understanding then said, "Sweetheart, I'm so glad your news reporting is better than your arithmetic."