It could be worse

News of the Flathead Lake monster making recent appearances should be treated with respect and kindness.

It could be worse.

For example, people in Elgin, Ill., a grimy blue-collar city on the Fox River about an hour west of Chicago—I used to live near there—apparently are trying to cash in on the "four-foot monkey" craze.

Seriously, they think they have a mini-Bigfoot running around.

According to an Aug. 6, 2005, article in the Suburban Chicago Daily Herald, "the latest sighting of the four-foot-tall primate reportedly roaming the area" was made at 5:30 p.m. Thursday, but this time it was in South Elgin.

"A call came into our dispatcher from the north end of Raymond Street that someone had seen the monkey," according to South Elgin Deputy Police Chief A.J. Moore.

An officer took a look but didn't find anything. However, earlier in the week, police received reports of a four-foot-tall monkey being seen on Elgin's southwest side near some apartments, several miles from a previous sighting.

Elgin police said they are taking the reports of monkey sightings seriously, according to the newspaper article. But that's not how the reporter started his story. He started it with the words: "This monkey must have wheels."

You have to take your creature sightings seriously, like we do here in the Flathead. I mean, we have to protect our economy. If I remember right, Elgin's economy centers around taverns.

But that's just my recollection. I also remember hearing that the Elgin Watch factory dumped uranium in the Fox River during a time when people thought uranium was harmless and when painted on your watch face sure made telling time easy in the dark.

The old watches still glow, and so does the Fox River if you kick up the river muck.

Signs along the Fox say you shouldn't eat more than two fish a year out of the river.

I saw people snagging all sorts of fish-like creatures and putting them in buckets.

One of those fish even made it on the front page of the weekly newspaper because no one, not even local fish biologists, could identify what it was.

Yes, be proud of our monster. Market it. Sell plastic models. Fly monster balloons. Tell people it exists.

Yes, it could be worse.

Take for example Croatia. Supposedly they have a "supermarket ghost" recently captured on security video

How do you market what appears to be a quickly moving shadow?

Or how about the "mysterious light" photographed in the woods southwest of Sudbury, Ontario, last year. Sure doesn't make me want to go there and spend money.

I think you agree people should come here if they want to see something real.