When fish fly

There are not many things more surprising to the average human than being clobbered by a fish from the sky. Remember when somebody up at Whitefish got smacked by a good-sized rainbow trout from heaven? Can't recall who or when, but it seems to me the person was hurt badly enough to require medical care. It happened sometime since they built the Whitefish mall because experts determined the trout was one of those planted in that kiddie fishing pond they dug there.

The worst "trout from heaven" incident I know about was over at Cascade a couple weeks ago where a big one zoomed out of the blue with the right trajectory to shatter the windshield on a Cascade school bus. Nobody got hurt but it was startling to those involved. After reading about that in the Great Falls Tribune, a lady who lives at Dearborn near the Missouri River said her husband Tom was out in their front yard the other day when a 13-inch trout fell close to him, and he noticed an osprey circling and squawking overhead.

All this trouble from falling fish can be traced directly to the osprey's knowledge of aerodynamics. Those big birds know that a trout should be carried in their talons with the head facing forward. A fish carried backwards or even crosswise, is much more difficult to fly with. That is why most fishing hawks will try to turn the fish around if they happen to grab it from the water facing the wrong way. It is not uncommon for an osprey to get some altitude then drop the fish and dive down to regrasp it properly, especially if it is a long flight back to the nest, or to its favorite dining tree.

Several years ago The Over the Hill Gang hiked over Howe Ridge to Trout Lake and I rigged up an ultralite rod and reel to cast phony flies upon the water. The first cutthroat to fall for this deceitful activity was a 15-incher and we were amazed to see it had survived an all out attack from an osprey. It had the deep body penetrating scars from talons along both sides. I know that fish had been for an unexpected flight in the sky. The miracle for the fish is that when the osprey went to turn around, it dropped it while they were still over the lake.

In my opinion the trout-rain phenomenon is not serious enough for government action, but that lady over at Dearborn says the ospreys have a nest by their house so she might make her husband Tom start wearing a helmet when he is outside. Let's hope somebody from OSHA doesn't hear about that. They've come up with some equally ridiculous ideas in the past.

Lot of wildlife news the last few weeks. Yellowstone rangers tranquilized a bull elk and cut off its horns at Mammoth because he was attacking cars, 12 in all, with around $15,000 in damages. The 19th of this month was the last straw. The bull kicked off his morning by goring a 60-year-old man from Texas who got close to take a picture, then banged up six more cars, and topped off his day's recreational activities by attacking a Park Service employee that night.

The frustrated bull doesn't have any horns now but he could well be thinking, "You ranger guys think you're pretty smart — but just wait 'til next year."

G. George Ostrom is news director of KOFI Radio and a Flathead Publishing Group columnist.